The Born Ass-Kisser

Accept it, we find these irritating random critters all around us. And we find no reason to point out the error in their ways and start a needless feud. Well, that's precisely why we have blogs for, so I'll harangue away to glory... Some traits of a born ass kisser...

• Some soul is fortunate( you rich bastard) enough to have a lot of family money floating around. Or maybe, he got into the IT industry in it's nascent stages, so now he has enough wealth(or having a mid-life crisis) to flaunt around. So, he buys a superbike to massage his fat ego. But, I have huge respects for the fat balding bloke... even to the extent that I will volunteer my tongue as a replacement to his toilet paper just to be friends with him.
• Oh you go to track days is it? Guess what friend, I have been taking some classes, and I promise my felatios will be consistently better than your girlfriends' or wife's. Just let me be your friend, I don't have any aptitude or inclination to head to the track, but I just want to be on your side and sing(kiss your ass) your praises.
• Oh Schumacher is winning races, total fan. Rossi seems to be good too or so everybody claims, total fan. You said Chelsea is winning this time is it? yeah I've been a fan since my birth. French Open, I have no clue what's going on, but I have always kissed Federer's privates... Nadal won? OMG I so told you guys, you didn't believe me. Nadal is the best.
• Man you are a total god in CS, I am your bitch. Heh, you stopped playing CS? what about you my friend? Oh you have been playing, and you have got better, nice... Consider my application for the position of your bitch now.
• I see this guy is making some noises, IOMTT, whats that.. damn where's my google.. ah this guy's been winning, I've never known what this is, but I gotta make the right noises too... Yes Mr.x is a total legend and I have always been a fan of his..
• I have never watched any of these tv series, but I heard some nice things, Yes. They are demi-gods of the telly world, I have watched one episode of most of the series on the list.
• Man I took yet another fall, I am waiting to get new shoes for my bike. Oh you say these are good and really that "illustrated" list of people swear by them? Haven't I told you how much I've loved the grip on these tyres? In fact, I just finished making love to them in the valve tube.
  

WTF, lemme end.. you guys get the point..